Every time something seriously bad/ tragic/ problematic happens, one can't help wondering, "why does God do things like this?" The faith in God does get questioned even if it is momentary.
In the process of dealing with my health condition and coming to terms with ways it might potentially change my life, I tried to seek answer to a deeper question - "what is this situation trying to teach me?" (if anything). I also had the "why me?" phase...
In the middle of this process I read somewhere, 'if in the middle of a crisis, there is something that makes you smile, that means God is playing a role in your life.'
- I found this very though provoking.
As this message played on my mind, I started noticing small things around me and noticed things did make me smile amidst all the bigger worries.
- While the procedures for the surgery took forever with no end in sight, spring in Bangalore brought beautiful weather and the trees were in full bloom. I couldn't stop to admire how beautiful the city streets looked with a riot of colorful flowers.
- After the initial calls, many family members and friends didn't call often as they didn't know what to say to me and then came along a wonderful surprise from my friends in Germany - they made a short movie expressing how much they missed us. It was extremely touching and thoughtful.
- The most unexpected - the door bell rings and I get a bunch of flowers and a little card. My team from Germany had sent this to me saying they missed me. Again. I was touched indeed.
- I couldn't make it to Oxford to do the final project submission. But thanks to two of my classmates, my project got submitted on my behalf and I even got to keep one copy as a souvenir
- I get my promotion at work - FINALLY!!!! I had been waiting for it for 4.5years. What better time to get such a news? It made me more than just smile :)
- We spent a lot of money changing our Lufthansa flights back as things just kept taking time. When we finally checked in, almost as a gift, V got an upgrade to business class...the almost flat bed seemed like a symbolic need to rest weary minds and body.
- All along I hear Germany had a bad, long, gray winter. Yet, when I get back home, flowers are blooming on my plants and spring finally makes its way...
- To add to the list of to dos, not only was my car tyre punctured, I had to get summer tyre and the dashboard showed engine trouble too...each having a different appointment dates. Not only did the car get picked up from my house but Euromaster skipped the appointment date and changed the tyre for me at the same time.
- ...
- ...
The list goes on...
But above all, while scientifically and medically my condition is worsening, the disruption to my day to day life is quite manageable. Touch wood!!
So...God indeed is in the small things. There are many reasons to smile every day...just have to stop and notice small seemingly insignificant things and appreciate it.
